Play Pictionary, shall we?
Nope, Not us.
” 5 dolla, sucky! sucky ! make happy”?
Lets talk stereotypes: White men marry Asian women because they are docile, subservient, make few demands and fewer complaints. Asian women like men who take control of their lives. Sex slavery and mail order brides do exist but that percentage is too less to make a stereotype.
“Because white men have bigger dicks”, “It’s for the money”,“ Colonial Hangover, everything white is superior yada yada ” – are the judgements freely thrown around.
I won’t argue the first point. Our population being 1 billion, it will take me a lifetime of sampling Indian men before I can make an educated guess on the average size. The other two opinions are what my rant is on.
I will now attempt to sketch a more realistic stereotype of these urban Asian women who marry White men. It will be from an Indian perspective. Urban, because more foreigners visit Delhi or Bombay than say Baripada. I will also stick to saying Asian because I look like this-
(While we are talking race – why are Indians called Indians even in official forms. Last I checked ‘Indian’ was a nationality, not a race.)
For most relationships to culminate into a marriage, the couple need a common language both are fairly fluent in. Mostly it’s English. Which means the woman has had more than just a basic education. In India education doesn’t come cheap, so chances are that the girl is at the least from a middle class family. She has an education and therefore access to a job which can afford her a fairly good quality of life. So she doesn’t really need any man’s money, white, brown or purple.
This woman is independent financially, independent in her life choices and is free to choose whom to mate or marry. (Let’s not sweep arranged marriages and ‘family pressure’ under the rug okay? ) In India, she possibly has a maid or two to do her household chores. If she lives in a city, she also has access to world class restaurants, spas and the kind of nightlife she would have to pay an arm and a leg for in Europe or most other developed countries. These women also know that when they shift countries, they will have to do their own cooking, laundry, scrub their own toilets even.
So it is not for the money, not for the size, not for the ‘white’ lifestyle. OMG! could it be for L.O.V.E?
Now I don’t know why most women who marry/ date white men choose to move out of India. I can only speak for myself.
Here are my reasons for wanting to move to Denmark:
1. My partner is a journalist who is most comfortable writing in Danish. My job as a PR and marketing consultant is less bound by language.
2. Journalists in India get paid far less than what they deserve so our combined income would be way lesser than in Denmark.
3. We hope to produce some cute interracial spawns and would like to live in a country where we get more family time. In Bombay most of my weekends are spent organising some event or the other.
4. It will be an adventure of sorts for me. I started working right after college, flitting across jobs, setting up my PR agency. Life has passed by too fast and I hope to reclaim my weekends if not my life.
5. I like Danish hot dogs- the eating kind. Try them.
Comments are open.
oh, tell me about it. I get frowned upon even here in Copenhagen whenever I’m out with my boyfriend. There are too many “suspicious” looking Asian-Danish pairs too here and sometimes you can’t quite blame the Danes from staring
In all honestly, I think there are just not enough good men out there. So, “white, brown, [yellow], or purple”, as long as they are a good guy, we mark that shiet.
i laughed at the hot dog comment of course. ^^
my parents were getting a little giddy once i turned 21 (gotta think about getting married at that point, according to them) and kept introducing me to other korean guys, always sons of their friends. imagine their surprise when i told them that i met a guy on my last trip in europe… with blond hair and blue eyes.
Penis size, money, or any other thing… LOVE is the only way to go !
- and danish hotdogs are pretty good.. Miss them !
Oh I totally married my husband for the free health care, ’cause you know we can’t get that in the states. He married me for the US green card, but HA on him, we live in Denmark!
And you know, I’ve always wanted to learn an obscure language that no one speaks….
Alas, being a WASP, the only response I get, after I tell people I originated in California is: Why the HELL did you move here?? Love is apparently not the right answer. You aren’t allowed to marry a Dane and live in Denmark for love. Maybe I’ll start telling people I was a mail-order bride or I’ve been kidnapped and sold in the white slave markets of Århus.
Lol Archeagoddess!
But again why the hell would ANYONE move from California. White slave, mail order bride story gets more convinicing by the minute.
Very convincing portrayal of educated, working women in India, just something people outside India (even Denmark!) may find illuminating. If it goes some way towards demolishing the stereotypes, you’d have done a great service to humanity in general and Indian women in particular.
All the best.
Arrey Baap Rey! Debasish thank you…but phrases like ‘great service to humanity and Indian women’ scare me.
There were a couple of women in my college who ALWAYS dated a white man from the batch of foreign exchange students every year.
Their lives, I suppose they were, and we didn’t judge them for the promiscuity in itself– but we had nothing but contempt for them, for sucking up to the white man in the worst way possible.
(Perhaps it was jealousy.)
Try substituting “PERSONAL Preference” in place of “sucking up”. And why jealous? Many fish in the sea etc.
No judgment on you, you understand. Personal preference is perfectly understandable. But I just felt it showed superficiality: always going for the light skin, as if your own race is beneath you.
i liked the post, i always read about this topic…its been spoken about everywhere…
interesting site btw.
Perhaps you are right in some instances of the way white men think when they see a asian woman, but being a white male I hope I can shed a little light on this subject, so that you don’t begin believing all whites are the above way.
I have to say that I find asians a very beautiful race. That is the first noteable attraction. Second is that asians tend to be very intellegent, though it is probably as you say. Most of our contact with asians are those who have had a good education to be able to speak english as well as their own, something I have much respect for.
Also to note something, I am 26 and most of the white girls I find are off into drugs, extremely promiscuous.. to say it in a nice way, down right rude and full of theirselves. The younger generation has gone down right wild, so how can anyone blame me if I seak the unknown?
Anyway those are just my two cents.
asian women worship the ground we walk on. plain and simple.
You are sick. My wife doesn’t worship the ground anyone walks on.
I am an asian woman who was born and raised in asian culture, but i am so crazy of white culture. (If i could be born to be white, I would choose to be one of them) I only want to date and marry white man, and I only like white people. I have dated some asian men before and I totally regret it. Mainly because I think white culture are simple. White men tend to be more responsible, gentlemen, romantic, manly and so on…. Sure, there are white men who are jerks and asshole ,but look at asian men again. Many of them are also the same. Many mrried asian men have mistresses, they go to “massage plus plus” and many other crazy places where you can get laid by prostitutes. Many asian girls are desperate to be rich that they have to sell themselves or to be business men’s mistresses. I seldom hear white women are desperate to have money just to buy them clothes and make up or to be pretty. I only hear this among asian women. It would take me hundred of pages to describe how good white people are and how not good (specially asian men) asian are. I know alot of my asian girlfriends who prefer white men than asian men because of the same reasons with me. I am trully sorry if you feel offended, but it’s just my opinion and how I look about things. Asian people are too much with culture and weird beliefs. I am myself born and raised in asian culture find how complicated it is to be asian. WHite people are just simple and don’t believe weird things. The most important is : compared to asian women, White women are less desperate to be rich and pretty as themselves are already naturally beautiful. and oh, white women without makeup are gorgeous, while asian women have to put tons of makeup to be pretty….. Moreover, asian women tend to be too skinny, flat chest and ass. No curve at all, not sexy ! White women have curves, breasts and ass, tall, long legged, nice firmed skin. (yea… yea..I know there are some who are overweight, fat , and have sagging breast, so are asians !!) Ahhh, how i wish to be one of them…
I married my wife not because she is Asian (Korean) but because she is she. That as 26 years ago and having produced two absolutely wonderful and beautiful daughters (Eurasian I think is the word) who are wonderful because of her, I wouldn’t want it any other way. In my eyes she is perfect in every way. She is neither docile or complacent. She is a VERY strong woman who puts me in my place (rightfully) when she feels she has to.
I had to pursue her and win her over…Not being Korean, I was a new experience for her….and her family wasn’t happy…and they were here in the United States. And my mother asked me why I couldn’t find a nice “white” girl. We did what we had to do and the rest is history.
It’s a shame to all human beings to let another generation decide who you should marry. Regardless of race, religion, gender. We all need companionship, and when you find that certain someone that brings you joy and happiness. Appreciate it for all it’s worth. Even though you like to please your family and friends. Please yourself and your spouse first. If your adult enough to make a life long commitment to someone then do it regardless of other peoples opinion. They don’t live with you. It’s that special someone that does. Be it European, Asian, African, American, White, black, red, .., Who cares. I don’t. Because I’m in love with a person. Not a color, tradition, or family. Just that one person. If people can’t except that. To bad.
I guess the real question is why do we see so many AF-WM couplings and not WF-AM. To explain THAT discrepancy, it is obviously not enough to invoke “love”. I would hazard a guess that the real reason for that comes from history and social class: during the colonial era, armies from European countries landed in Asia and many white soldiers married with local womenfolk. Over time, the social acceptability of Asian women marrying White men gets gradually accepted. If you look at areas where the power differential is in the other direction: for example the border between increasingly rich China and dirt poor Southern Russia, you would notice that almost all the couplings there are WF-AM.
Im Chinese and my current gf is Swedish, she’s hot, young and pretty. We’re both living in Australia now, many local white men are jealous and swear some kind of racial dirty words towards us.
You can found that white men like to ‘expand’ news/stories/arguements that Asian girls like White men. This can be apply to SE Asia (e.g.Phillipine/Thailand/Cambodia which are financially disadvantage), but it is absolutely untrue for East Asian (ie.Chinese, Korean and Japanese) girls. I can assert 99.9% of girls from China prefer Chinese men as priority and quite anti-foreigners. What the white men in China like to do is expanding those articles that can degrade local men, shape the local men as dirty, ugly, weak and treat women badly, so as to upgrade themselves resulting in more confidence to date local girls. This is also what hollyhood film makers’ style is. It just proves that they look more more like losers.