I am a prude girl. I like the people of Denmark very much but I need to know them a lot more before taking my clothes off for them. I get naked for the masseur, the doctor, the waxer and sometimes for the husband. I certainly dont have a problem with nudity around other people as along as they have necessary business with my body. It is getting naked in front of a random audience that bothers me.
Image © Mark Parisi
Going to the gym terrifies me. There are no private showers! Not only do you have to shower with a row of other naked ladies, you need to walk back naked to the locker area. In the locker room one is greeted by many ladies, naked as they day they were born, but all grown up, so they stand there naked making small talk, applying lotion or drying their hair.
I simply cannot do the awkward naked nonchalant walk of zero of self consciousness from locker to shower area and back to locker. Investigation reveals that this lack of private showers plagues most Danish gyms, spas and swimming halls. I usually take my things out of the locker and walk out un-showered and get dirty looks from the clean naked ladies. Sometimes I give nervous mumbled explanations to no one specific that home and shower are only 5 minutes away.
It is great this confident, fuss free, love and accept your body approach. But why! Oh why is privacy so underrated? I don’t have many body issues but I do like to keep my private parts private. I wish public places like gyms had options for privacy.
Some of you will explain that that Danes have been getting naked at public showers since childhood, they are used to it, they don’t care or stare. But my highly reliable Danish sources say it’s not true. Danes simply have more practice so they disguise it well but yes they do check out other naked people! This has made it even harder for me to get naked at the gym.
That said, Denmark, I heard a rumour that every human has the right to food, clothing and shelter. If you let me keep my clothes on, I will take care of the other two.
Whenever one makes a teeny complaint about Denmark some idiots will rush in to say – It is worse in India. They wear so many clothes or leave if you don’t like it here. I dare you to ask me to leave because I refuse to get naked.
I used to arrange it so all I needed to do was bring my keys, easily kept in the pocket, so I could go in, workout and leave again without going near the locker room lol
Thats a good arrangement! But this winter situation calls for jackets and scarves to be put away in the locker room.
Oh god, I hate the naked thing. I really truly hate it.
Having to shower in front of 60 other women everyday for SIX WEEKS in basic training took care of any lingering gang-shower issues I had. I don’t mind using those showers, I just hate that I’m a slightly pudgy, polka-dotted American showering amongst bronzed, blonde, Nordic glamazons. So I revert to basic training trick of keeping eyes on ceiling, floor, or tiles in front of me. As long as I don’t SEE them looking at me, it’s all good.
And this was probably waaaay TMI.
But you know THEY are checking you out even if your eyes are glued to the ceiling…right?
Of course, but it is one thing to know they are looking, and another thing entirely to catch them in the act!
I try my best to bring a towel as close to the shower as possible and wear it there and back.
In the UK, sometimes there are communal showers and sometimes there are private ones, so I have had a bit of practice. But people DO NOT speak to each other while dressing. THAT IS DISGUSTING.
But yeah, see how close you can get the towel to the shower heads.
I think the chatter is because my gym has a very popular ‘buy membership for one & bring a friend for free” offer. I wish they would shut up and accept that we are a room full of awkward naked women.
There are delicate matters of putting lotion and wearing clothes etc after a shower, difficult to do with towel on. I am sticking to walking out unshowered
I do understand why women from other cultures are not comfortable being naked in “public” – and yes, I do think that it’s a good idea to istall a couple of private showerstalls for those uncomfortable with being naked (I think some places have them, but you need to ask for the location and key), but…and this is probably the Dane in me… I don’t understand why nakedness should equal awkward silence – or awkwardness in general for those used to being naked around strangers.
I do chat with friends while showering and getting dressed and don’t see why my behaviour around them should change just because I can see their boobs. Also, it’s a perfect time to decide where to go for lunch.
)
And no…have never seen any nakedness worth oogling at. Boobs and arses are just not that terribly interesting. *grin*
@ May- Well I find it awkward to be naked in public along with some other very routine things like digging my nose, taking a dump, farting etc.
I think is due to social conditioning. Even in my all girls boarding school we had private showers. It was more about privacy than shame about the human body. Damn social conditioning ruined it for me
And oh I think the human body is so worth ogling at! Some bodies are fine works of art!
Art yes, but that would be in a different setting, where the owner of the body in question would be prepared to be oogled at.
And yes, I agree with the social conditioning. In Switzerland it’s perfectly acceptable to LOUDLY blow your nose at the table. I felt very icked out the first time I experienced that and had to make an effort not to gag.
Okay, I’ll try to explain it. It is disgusting to talk to people while they are changing or putting on body lotion etc, because in that moment they are vulnerable and/or touching their privates/underwear and making good eye contact means you will catch sight of their boobies and pubic hair in peripheral vision.
Showering communally means that I don’t clean my sweaty bum cleft either and this benefits no one, I can tell you.
Plus, being a (bit of a) homo, I end up ogling ladies’ lower backs (not bums or boobs for me) and feeling bad for invading their privacy.
I am glad you do understand why women from other cultures are not comfortable being naked in “public”, but as you are not from another culture, perhaps it will never be obvious how very much staring does go on in the naked public areas of Denmark (i think Germany is similar though?).
If it was so natural then why the hell they staring so much. It’s a horrible atmosphere.
I’ve been in other nudist scenarios in my time, in other countries, and I have to say, the peculiar ‘drinking it in’ aspect of the Danes in their public naked phase is really quite specific.
It’s creepy.
But as a woman from another culture who is not happy about being naked in public, I can tell you, you’ve been conditioned not to balk at the sight of nakedness.
Danish nakedness doesn’t have a feeling of purity to it. There is something weird about the disrespect this culture shows to privacy and one’s OWN body.
The last straw for me came when two old bags stood peering at a young girl showering. I demanded to know what in the hell they were paying so much attention to (the child was shrinking) and they informed me they were doing so to make sure she washed her crotch.
Get real May, it’s not right and it isn’t groovy.
Goodness, gracious me Babs, why are you getting all hot and bothered??? Do you hate all things Danish??
Oy…I’m with you on the naked thing. I have major body issues and the last thing I need is to imagine what other people are seeing when confronted with my nakedness. And, quite frankly, I don’t like seeing other people naked. I am constantly afraid that my eyes will wander and that someone will catch my eyes wandering, and then I’ll be branded as a pervert for the rest of my life….and I so don’t need that.
i’m black. most of these chicks have not see a black ladies cooch hair or dark nipples. i have had outright staring. not cool. i now avoid and run home sweaty and stinky to my basement shower.
I have been to public baths in Japan where everybody is showering naked together…It was awkward but I just pretend other people don’t exist.
dreamingindanish I’m not surprised people stare. Last summer I was walking around town with a black friend (i’m a white guy btw) and everyone would stare, like they saw a ghost. I even felt uncomfortable because of it. But I didnt take it in a bad way, people are not used to anything different here.
I’ve even become a bit like the danes in some ways. Everytime I see someone a bit coloured, I look because it’s a novelty!! and I’m from London believe it or not. Yes, yes Ive probably been here too long, far too long.
Regarding being naked in changing rooms, I go to a gym here. In the mens changing room men frequently wander around naked, brush their hair, chat, shave, organise their things while totally naked. They dont even attempt to hide their bits or wrap a towel around themselves. I just look at the floor. Im no prude but i try not to walk around flapping my bits at everyone and I dont want to see other mens bits for longer than is necessary.
The other gross thing is the toilets. They are sooo dirty with wee on the floor. They stink to hell (it’s a basement gym) and there is no aircon or ventilation. Men walk bare footed in them. Don’t they care about all the wee, used toilet paper, dirt and rubbish on the floor?
Methinks it’s quite specific to the Scandis. Do the Germans do this? I find it horrid. I wouldn’t like it anyway now I not at my most gorgeous, but after years abroad in (sorry about the yawns) an Arab country it was an unthinkable shock. But even outside traditional parts of the world I think Danish jolly communal nudity is a bit weird. Actually I think it’s barbaric. Went to train with a friend a couple of months ago and went to the greatest lengths not to look at her boobs and worse. Owww, it was yucky. We both got dressed as fast as we possibly could. I don’t *want* to see my middle-aged friends in their underwear. Certainly don’t want ot be seen myself.
In Cairo, you change in the loo, and emerge fully dressed. There wouldn’t be communal shower-rooms. Or those really horrible sweeper things. But then there would be somebody else to do that horrible job of, eeuwww, sweeping up hair, ow.
But here we have total social fairness and we have to do it ourselves !! How delectable !!
Hey Khawaga! Long time!
I dont find the nudity horrid. I wish to someday, host a naked high-tea or walk past Amalienborg palace sniffing a rose in my naked glory. But till such a time arrives, I wish public spaces would make provisions for some privacy for those who need it.
I agree, there is nothing horrid about nudity.
But our kids should have a choice about whether they are nude with others.
They don’t get the chance if they are cultured in Denmark, where kids are made to strip naked and shower together regardless of whether it feels ‘right’.
It is such a joke to hear the people who call themselves Danes bragging about how child sexual abuse is rare here…when it is fecking endemic!!
Try saying “What the fuck are you staring at?” when they stare, and watch the room erupt. Amazing how hostile a room full of sweaty naked women can get!
Yeps, been there and done that.
But seriously, they are not well.
You’ll find it in Japan at the naked bathhouses or outdoor hot springs. People spending hours, sitting and talking totally naked. And of course seeing a foreign person just opens up for them to come over and practice their English. “How are you?” “Do you eat sushi?” And what’s worse is that is really popular to do with your coworkers on staff trips. I had one friend who, while sitting in a bath naked with her boss, her boss looks her up and down and says, “We’re so glad you’re not one of the fat Americans” Talk about not eating ever again. But unlike Denmark where you can find people nude at the beach or topless in the park, in Japan it is a sin (in some parts) to where only a tank top since you are showing too much chest.
The Japanese sound so interesting!
So, how much should I pay to get a job as a gym instructor / locker administrator in Denmark?
I LOVE THE JAPANESE!!!! Not because they do nude too, but because they exude an air of honesty. I love the way they smile at me in the street (I smile right back!!).
What is happening in Japan to make the Japanese so lovely? And how can I be more like them?